So "I like your tie" is nice, but "I like your tie and how it matches your eyes" will be more memorable (though possibly corny and in some cases be viewed as a pick-up line!)
So "the workpaper you prepared was well done" is nice, but "the workpaper you prepared was great, especially the way you linked the results of the analytical procedures performed in revenues to the related expense accounts."
Providing more detail makes a compliment more memorable and people will know better what kind of "actions" to repeat.
BUT there are also other types of compliments, those that may be harder to pick out and those that will be less common, but can be VERY powerful. These are "YOU" compliments.
What are "YOU" compliments? I distinguish "you" from "action" compliments because action compliments describe specific actions a person did, where as "you compliments" go beyond that and provide more about what level that person has achieved.
Let me give you some examples. Notice these comments are NOT necessarily specific, but they are about the other person. (They may in fact elicit follow up questions from the person being complimented.) They are, however, loaded. They make the receiver of the comment think about their contribution...
"I like the way you approached the meeting this morning. You brought your best self and your attitude rubbed off on others."
"I was surprised by how well you handled that criticism from Ted. Most people would have just fired back and fought him, but you are at another level now in the way you lead others."
These "YOU" comments make people ponder where they are, where they have been, and in short they allow people some time and space to feel proud about their growth. When you can do that more often, when you can just be on the look-out more often to uncover these "YOU" compliments, WATCH OUT for the kind of empowering environment you help create based on how people will respond!
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