Good listening is not just WHAT, but also WHY

The other night my wife was talking about her next workday. She had a big deadline so we were talking and I volunteered to take our kid to daycare the next day to help. She agreed.

Later that night, after I had fallen asleep watching a ball game on the couch, she approaches me and mentioned that she cleaned the dishes while I was asleep (something I usually do) and she prepared our kid's food for the next day. Then she says, "So that makes us even."

What was my reaction? It was about me. I said, "I do not always worry about us being even."

I was not listening to the WHY. Why was she saying what she said? If I had been thinking about what she was saying from her point of view (instead of my own) all she was looking for was appreciation. That's it. Simple.

So what is the point beyond learning from this blogger's mishaps? Listen to others so intently that you not only hear the what but you feel the why, THEIR WHY, not your why. It will help you become a much better listener and speed up your communications because you understand the "Why."